Eighth Grade (2018)
Who Are You?
Coming-of-age films are perfect for exploring identity. Eighth Grade uniquely tackles this theme in the digital age, focusing on anxiety and constant performance. The movie follows Kayla (Elsie Fisher) during her last week of middle school as she deals with anxiety, social media, and peer acceptance. Kayla uploads videos to YouTube, portraying herself as a confident motivational speaker, but in reality, she is quiet and shy. Her supportive father, Mark (Josh Hamilton), is frustrated by her constant phone use.
Comedian Bo Burnham wrote and directed the film. He started on YouTube and is fascinated by the performing artist's need for attention. His other projects, like Zach Stone is Gonna Be Famous (2013) and Inside (2021), also explore this theme. Burnham created Eighth Grade as a response to his anxieties as a performer.
Middle School Struggle
Middle school is a fitting backdrop for a film about identity. I remember my middle school experience as a time when I became suddenly aware of myself and my surroundings. It felt like waking up from childhood, aware of my body and the space it occupied. Yet, the autonomy I craved couldn't exist since I still depended on my parents and the school ecosystem. For many, middle school is the first time they consciously ask, "Who am I?"
Our identities are constantly changing and evolving. We spend our lives learning how to express who we are, like gifts slowly being unwrapped. The film opens with one of Kayla's videos, where she gives advice on "being yourself." Her nervous words reflect more of her aspirations than actual advice. The rise of social media complicates our search for identity, as we see with Kayla. She is stuck in a comparison loop, much like many teenagers whose self-worth is tied to their surroundings. The need for peer validation can lead to acting as others expect rather than being true to oneself.
“This is not just an adolescent issue but one that affects all ages.”
Kayla's YouTube videos curate an online persona she wishes to embody. This conflict is highlighted when she wins "most quiet" in her school superlatives, revealing the gap between her true self and how others perceive her. This is not just an adolescent issue but one that affects all ages. Throughout my life, I've dealt with crippling social anxiety, making it hard to be myself in new environments. I often coped by mentally pretending to be someone else, thinking, "How would Justin Bieber handle this?" This stemmed from a deep feeling of not belonging, believing I was too different to be loved or accepted as I was. This belief led me to self-sabotage relationships and spaces where I was offered belonging.
What the Father Sees
Being your whole self and expressing who you are is difficult. It's often easier to fit in or remain silent. Kayla experiences this in many relatable moments. Her salvation comes when she meets Olivia (Emily Robinson), a high school senior who offers her kindness and acceptance. However, this safe space is shattered by Olivia's friend Riley (Daniel Zolghadri), who sexually harasses her.
It is hard to watch Kayla struggle to break out of her shell, only to be hurt and retreat back. At the heart of this is Kayla's father, who tries to connect with his daughter. Throughout the film, Kayla searches for identity and self-worth everywhere but within herself. In a tender moment by the fire, we learn that Kayla's father truly sees her, giving her the confidence to face adversity and put herself out there.
While I condensed much of the film into two key moments, the scene between Kayla and her father resonates deeply with me. Though Bo Burnham likely intended it as encouragement for parents, I see it spiritually: Your Father in Heaven sees you. When you feel awkward, excluded, or don't fit in, know that God truly understands and embraces you. It took me a long time to accept this because my various environments had different standards. But God's grace gives us the space to grow into ourselves and discover the divine desires within us.
Kayla's social media lens is unavoidable in our increasingly digital age. Technology is how we communicate now, but social media doesn't always capture who we are. It's a small box that can't contain the fullness of our voice and personality. Eighth Grade offers us time to reflect on our own stories and appreciate how far we've come. By the film's end, we see a hopeful Kayla ready to take on high school and continue growing. May we also have the faith to trust that we will find ourselves along the unknown road of the future.
